First of all, happy 3rd birthday to The Fab Five – Brooklyn Faith, Britton Grace, Jack William, Lila Addison, and Ryan Elizabeth!!!

Three years.  Has it really been that long?  Wait – has it really been that short??  The answer to both questions is yes…resoundingly!  When the doctor told us 3 years, 5 months, 9 days, 2 hours, and a handful of minutes ago (who’s counting, huh??) that we were going to be raising quintuplets, we knew we were in for the biggest challenge we’ve ever faced.  And we were right – the Quintuplet Invasion left no stone unturned in its mission to force change, challenge, defeat, and triumph into every aspect of our world – and the invasion continues today.

We also knew on that day that in facing this challenge – these challenges – win, lose, or draw, we were going to be richly rewarded for our efforts.  And again we were right – the 5 little blips on the TV screen that day turned into 5 little miracles, 5 little blessings, 5 enormous personalities, and at times 5 little tyrants……..

But we were also wrong about a few things, too…our crystal ball must have been a little fuzzy that day (and so were our heads and our hearts and our spirits and our perspective and our…ok, pretty much everything was fuzzy that day!).  Mostly, I think we were wrong about the scale of things.  The challenge has been far greater than even we imagined and the change these challenges have wrought has been far deeper and life-lasting.  And so too have been the rewards…in which case, the changes have been life-everlasting.

 Yep – three years.  And countless smiles.  Three years…and more wiggles than you can imagine.  Three years and………..

More imagining than we’ll ever again experience…

More surprises,  good and bad, the memories of which will never fade…

More anguish over the color of a sippy cup than any man should have to be a witness to…

More sweet little voices than a man can bear saying things like, “I love you, daddy!” and “You’re beautiful, Mommy!” and “You-you-you getting your boogers out, Daddy?”…

An endless supply of lost shoes, missing stuffed animals, messy floors, messy mouths, and messy clothes as well as broken crayons, broken toys, and sometimes broken hearts and broken dreams…

An expert knowledge of the negotiating tricks and skills of a two-year-old trying to avoid bedtime as if their life depended on it…

A lifetime worth of pull-your-hair-out frustration after a night-after-night routine of facing the negotiating tricks and skills of 5 two-year-olds trying to avoid their bedtimes as if their lives depended on it…

Countless diapers, countless middle-of-the-night wake-up calls, endless drama, endless chaos and countless picture-taking opportunities for my endlessly crazy wife!!!!  But I digress…

A steady supply of warmth, care, and love from friends, family, and once-upon-a-time strangers who have carried us through some of the most difficult times we have faced along this path…

An overflowing of pride and joy and gratitude at the sight of Eliot McKenna being everything a big sister should be and becoming more and more of what a big sister should be with each new passing moment…

Not enough date nights, vacations, and moments of peace with my endlessly crazy wife, but more longing for each than either of us can stand at times…

Never enough hugs and cuddles from our oftentimes too busy tots…

A continuous loop of the subtly-maddening choruses of Barney and Friends…and Toddler Tunes…and Little Einsteins…and Wonder Pets…and Dora and Diego…and Disney princesses…and “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”…and…ok, I’ll stop now…

A never-faltering faith in God’s hand at work in the life of this family…

Three years.  5 little miracles.  Life…abundant.

God bless,

Ethan

For more photos of the birthday celebration, follow us here:  JonesLife on Facebook!

Marleigh Kendal Sanders died today, 3-1/2 weeks after she was born.  I don’t know much about her, I never met her, and I don’t know her family yet, somehow I was deeply touched by her story and her confounding, maddeningly short life.  I do not know exactly what it was that afflicted her body and caused her to pass…from what I can tell on the Facebook updates I have been following, I don’t think the doctors who were working on her know either.  And I do not know why I am not sleeping right now, why I haven’t been able to get little Marleigh and her family off of my mind since hearing her story, and I don’t know why exactly I am writing this right now.  Nevertheless, here I am, typing away and pondering the life of a little baby girl I will never meet on this side of Heaven…

When Casey was pregnant with the quints obviously there were a lot of things that we could have chosen to worry about…and we selected our fair share among the choices we were offered.  Casey’s immediate health was in danger and would only get worse as the pregnancy progressed.  The health of the babies was a constant source of attention and they were carefully monitored, at times painstakingly so, to ensure there were no problems.  The striking fear of premature labor ticked and tocked between our ears, constantly counting the minutes remaining before the unknown hour at which the babies would make their entrance into the world.  Depending on how far along the pregnancy had gone before that time determined how worried we should be about the babies’ chances of survival.  So we worried and we prayed and we asked for prayers…and we worried.  And no matter how much we prayed and how many times people prayed for us, whether known to us or not, and no matter how much time we spent trying not to worry, our concern for the health of the babies would not allow us to stop worrying.  The thought of one our babies suffering…or worse…was simply too big and our faith too small…and so we worried and we prayed…and we worried.

The Bible says not to worry…says it very clearly in fact.  Jesus said, “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life – whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear…Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?  Why do you have so little faith?  Don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries.  Today’s trouble is enough for today.”  He was right, you know that by now in regards to our story and our babies.  They all came into the world in perfect health for babies at their stage of development.  All five of them, each individually wowed the doctors with how well they had developed in the womb and with how incredibly they were responding to their new world.  I remember one of the NICU doctors telling me that they were all “at various stages of excellent!”  I’m pretty certain the doctor got a hug from us that day…and I’m pretty certain Casey and I both cried tears of relief, joy, and pride.  That’s right, tears of pride…but for what?  Jesus was right.  Our worry did nothing to breathe life into our babies.  Our fear did nothing to ensure their health.  When we wrung our hands, no healthy baby mojo or magic was produced!  In fact, we did absolutely nothing that contributed to the vibrancy of our bundle of babies.  Absolutely nothing…except pray, I’ll give you that.  Prayer works, I believe it, and we did a lot of praying and we know that we were lifted up in prayer by people across the globe.  We had an army of prayer warriors at our disposal and their services were in-disposable in ways we’ll never fully understand.

But didn’t Marleigh’s family pray as well?  It seems very clear to me that yes, they did pray.  And not only that, it seems very clear to me as well that they also had an army behind them praying for Marleigh’s health…prayers that apparently were in vain.  God was silent on this one…he allowed Marleigh’s life to slip away today and he took her home with him in spite of the prayer and the worry and the wringing of hands no doubt done by her family and many, many others on her behalf.  I don’t need to say it, but I will do so nonetheless:  why?  Marleigh Kendal Sanders is no less special than Brooklyn Faith, Britton Grace, Jack William, Lila Addison, or Ryan Elizabeth so why did they thrive while Marleigh had to fight for every last breath she took until she took her last?  Only God knows if her family or ours is more faithful or said more prayers or whatever, but I really don’t think He is keeping score.  Marleigh and her family deserve every good and wonderful thing that comes their way…so why didn’t the good and wonderful come this time?

No question I am not the first to ponder these thoughts and no doubt I will not be the last.  And of course I do not have any answers for you…or them.  Sure, we could recite all of the cliches that people utter in times like these…everything happens for a reason, God loved Marleigh too much to let her stay, etc, etc…and they would likely be true, but I don’t think that would help anyone right now.  Not me and likely not her family either.  At some point, all of those words will hopefully help and again they will likely be true, but right now they just seem hollow and empty.  True or not, the cliches do not meet the most desperate desire of times like these…they do not tell us why, they do not give us understanding, they do not bring peace.  Not now, not yet.

And so we do what I imagine Marleigh’s family is still doing right now…we pray.  We pray for understanding and answers and for peace with those answers if and when they ever come.  We pray because our spirit tells us to…we pray because Jesus prayed…and we pray because in those prayers, eventually, peace comes.  And it comes to us in spite of the absence of understanding and answers.  That’s what prayer does.  It doesn’t solve the problems, it doesn’t answer the questions…not always anyway.  It simply provides peace when there can be no answers and where there can be no understanding.  Jesus wrestled and sweat blood in agony during the hours leading up to his crucifixion and horrendous death.  But before it was all over he prayed, “not my will, but thine be done.”  He prayed…he found peace.  And so that is what I’ll be doing for Baby Marleigh and her family and I ask for you to do the same.  Pray for their peace and pray for the peace of others that you know are struggling with the why’s of the world.  At times, it is the only thing we can do.  Much of the time, it’s the only thing we should do.

God bless,

Ethan

*I sent this post over to Marleigh’s Aunt Savannah to ask for her permission before I published it.  Below is part of her response and some info that she wanted to share.

If you want to add – Marleigh died from Alveolar Capillary Dysplasia. A very rare disease that occurs in about 1 in 2 million births and there have been just over 100 cases known in the world. There is very little research being done about it but Baylor University and hospital are the biggest research base for it. it has 100% mortality rate. They think it is genetic but there is no way of testing for it right now. people can read her story at www.marleighonelove.com if they would like.

Always,
Savannah

Whew! What a week it has been!!! There is the obvious: keeping up with the demands of this not-so-normal family and our show airing on TLC Tuesday night (that part tends to fill your email inbox pretty quickly). Then there is the not-so-obvious: being stuck in rotation on the mindless carousel that is the City of Austin’s construction permitting process, trying to put the wraps on a major project for my MBA program, and pursuing new project leads that have come in recently.  All of this adds up to ONE…CRAZY…WEEK!!  Aside from the permitting thing, it’s been a whole heckuva lotta crazy fun though, so we’re all smiles over here!!

I’ll start this little recap with the obvious.  The show airing and the response to it has been phenomenal (if not in TV world, certainly in Jones world)!  First, just to see your family on such a big network and to see all of the things they did to promote the show was so awesome!  Really, they surprised us with the big push to the point that the attention was a little discomforting, in a good sort of way…it’s kind of strange to hear a voice-over say, “fall in love with the Joneses” and know that they are referring to your family.  It’s also kind of strange to have your name thrown around with the Gosselin’s and the Duggar’s…scary…very, very scary, my friends!!

And the other obvious?  You know, that family of ours.  Well, it’s been quite a week for them as well.  While Eliot ran off to play with the grandparents this week for Spring Break, Casey Ann and I held it down with the Fab Five.  And they decided that this was their week to show off some new-found skills!  As of this week, we now have five walkers (Jack and Lila decided it was finally time to join the others in the toddler class), five kinda talkers (Britton especially is all about the b’s – baby, bottle, bye-bye, and bubbles!), two future WWE wrestlers (Britton and Jack have perfected the log roll!), one yoga master (Brooklyn does a mean downward facing dog!), and one circus performer (or performer of some kind as Ryan demands your attention…all of the time…with all of her new tricks!).  Oh, and we also have five growlers as they have all decided to be angry, little baby bears with a mean and menacing growl…Brooklyn has the scariest growl of all!  Just wait until Eliot gets back into this crrrraaaaazzzyy mix!

As for the not-so-obvious, life outside of baby world is crazy busy as well, but part of the craziness is quickly coming to a close, thank God!  My MBA program will be complete in a little over a month which will of course free up lots and lots of time.  And, thankfully as well, 2010 looks to be much better on the business front as leads have been picking up since mid-January…being crazy busy on that front is a problem I am very much looking forward to having!

We would like to thank everyone for their support, words of advice, words of admonishment (ok, hard to be thankful for those, but we’ll take the bad with the good), inspiring stories, and words of encouragement!  We have heard from so many wonderful people who have their own story to tell or have found inspiration in hearing our story…the words “overwhelmed,” “gratified,” “humbled,” and “vindicated” immediately come to mind.  At this point, we do not know if our show will be picked up as a series or not, but we are hopeful that it will.  Let me repeat:  we are hopeful that our show will become a series!  Yes, despite the threat of impending doom to our marriage, our morals, and our maternity ward, we believe that people’s lives (ours included) have been, can be, and will continue to be positively impacted through a TV show and hopefully through our TV show (there, I said it, I meant it, and I’m not ashamed of it!).  To those who do not believe that this is possible and to the cynics who have found comfort in their too-bitter worldview, I say this:  read the comments posted to the entries on this blog and read them with an open heart and tell me how it could be otherwise.  Better yet, forget about  how you think God would and would not work in the lives of others and forget about trying to predict how the future of our family will take shape and simply accept events as they unfold, one day at a time…live and let live, for your sake and mine.

All kidding aside, we are very grateful for this opportunity, very mindful of the pitfalls that are sure to challenge us, and very accepting of your prayers for us in that regard.  We entered into this adventure with caution and it is with this same level of prayerful consideration that we will take each new step.  And make no mistake, we need your prayers just as we did when Casey was pregnant and your conversations with Christ carried us through to the day of the babies’ birth and beyond!  I’m not just giving lip service to this, I really mean it.  We believe in the power of prayer and we believe in the power of community (even an on-line community at that!).  And when you combine these two powers, amazing things can happen in your life and in mine!  We have witnessed it, we have experienced it, and we continue to thirst for it.  So join us in this pursuit:  harnessing the power of prayer and the power of this community and allowing God to work in your life and mine to the betterment of all!!

The Jones 8 and our little entourage made our way back to Riverbend Church yesterday to kick off the diaper drive they are hosting for us this month.  Man, it was great to be back!  We are really looking forward to the day when we can make more regular Sunday morning appearances, but yesterday made it clear that we are not quite ready for that!  It took four adult helpers (thank you, Stevie, Michelle, Tricia, and Avery!) to help get The Fab Five primped, prepped, stuffed, and buffed for their big appearance on stage!  Imagine getting five babies bottled, changed, dressed, fed breakfast, calmed, and buckled into their car seats in a little less than an hour and then you can imagine why it took so much help…and oh yeah, me, Casey, and Eliot still had to manage to get ready at the same time..aaaaagggghhhh!!  In spite of the chaos, the event went great – Riverbend is always so good to us!  We skipped their morning naps, but the babies did not seem to notice (no meltdowns and no crying on stage!) and Eliot played the role of Superstar Big Sis better than ever!

The Entourage and The Fab Five

Britton Plays Peek-A-Boo While Ryan Blows Kisses

We are so grateful to Riverbend Church and the generosity of the congregation for making this happen for us!!  We are proud to be associated with a church home that puts its faith into action all across Austin and around the world.  Here are some of the other outreach programs Riverbend and its members did during 2009……

• 10,000 meals served to the homeless and poor across Austin by Riverbenders, with a goal to more than double that 2010.
• 3,000 underprivileged children received Christmas gifts that might not otherwise have, thanks to the generosity of Riverbend’s congregation.
• Over 450 volunteers serve all across Austin in September.  Riverbend’s 30/30 project (30 service projects in 30 days) touched the lives of thousands of Austinites.
• 8 trips to Reynosa Mexico by Riverbenders, helping our neighbors across the border who struggle with no running water or electricity.
• Teams of Riverbend volunteers provide meals, school supplies and encouragement to families, students and teachers in some of Austin’s most challenging public schools.
• Exploratory service and outreach trips to Guatemala, El Salvador, Uganda and Rwanda, as the Missions team researches a possible 3^rd world serving opportunity where our people can use their time, talent and treasure to make a difference in this world.

Riverbend’s motto is this:  We exist to allow others to experience God’s love and grace, both on our campus and off our campus, reaching out especially to those who are bruised, battered, broken, and bored, and are looking for help and searching for something more.  We have been members of this church for seven years now and it has been so awesome to join this church community in living out its commitment to Christ’s principles.  I never would have guessed that we would have a need to experience first-hand, but now I cannot imagine how we could have gotten along without it!

For more information on the diaper drive, click here:  Riverbend Diaper Drive.

Getting Primped Backstage

I’ve been contemplating doing a post like this for quite some time, but I always held back for some reason. I often think a bit too much into things and that is probably what I am doing here (As a matter of fact, Casey just read this post and said that I’m laying it on a bit too thick so it looks like I’m up to my usual tricks…but onward I charge!). Here’s the deal…unfortunately, the responses to this blog and the way that we have chosen to live our lives are not always positive. And the cynicism that swirls around our story all too often finds its way into my inbox. It wasn’t unexpected, but it still isn’t much fun to deal with.  And Try as I might, I often fail the “sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never harm me” test that we all learned so well in elementary school! I’m guessing, actually I am certain, this blog post will invite more attention from the cynics and I guess that is why I’ve hesitated to hit the “publish” button on this post.

It has been our sincere hope from the day we started this adventure that God would use our lives to impact others, even in the tiniest of ways. Well I am here to tell you that this hope has not been in vain, as the following words will attest. Below is a small sampling of the words of encouragement, support, and inspiration that we have received since the adventure took over our lives. And as this story grows, it is our prayer that our inbox is stuffed with more of these stories, more stories of love and appreciation and of God’s touch on individual lives made possible by His creative hand in the beginning of these five tiny lives…

Thank you to everyone out there who has supported us, in words, thoughts or deeds. And most especially, thank you to those who have found inspiration in our story and have shared your story with us!

“I helped very little but gained so much from the miracle of the Jones family.” BJ

“It has been my joy to be associated with (the babies) and the rest of the family. You all bring a lot of joy to my heart.” FS

“I really am proud of how you are using your experience to reach others. Congratulations!” JP

“I truly look forward to my weekly visit and helping out with the Fab Five – they are angels from Heaven.” CS

“I think your story should be told. There is no way you guys would have got this far without your faith in God and each other. You are good people and will be an example to those that watch.” DB

“Little did I know that following the Joneslife, I would be spiritually uplifted. Your blog has reached out to me and reminded me of the morals and values that I was raised with. And although the flame to my light had dimmed over the years, reading your blog and following your story made MY light shine brighter.” VM

“You guys are a sweet family and are a great role model for families out there. I read this and think about how much you and Casey do – it really is an inspiring story.” BC

“I just wanted you to know that your faith has inspired me more than you will ever know. I was amazed by your strength as the babies were in the NICU and even more so when you were struggling in “survival mode.” Thanks for allowing me to experience your journey through your writings!” MH

“Your family has made a HUGE impact on my life as well. I am blessed to know the Jones and all the volunteers I have met in your home.” MT

“Thank you for making your story public with us Austinites from the beginning…I wouldn’t know you guys otherwise and the quints have definitely had a positive impact on my life! For that I’m so grateful to you and Casey for giving me this once in a lifetime opportunity!!” JE

“They are always so thankful for the volunteers, but the little secret is that it probably does more for my stress level and happiness than they could ever know! I always leave there with a smile. The world needs more parents and friends like them.” MT

“We have been following your journey since before the Fab Five arrived and we love your tweets and blogs. It reminds us that no matter what we are faced with, trust in God and we’ll be ok. We have a daughter with special needs who is 6-1/2 so we often need reminding that all will be ok :)” ML from Australia

“Your children are absolutely beautiful! I can’t tell you how much my daughter and I have enjoyed watching them grow.” TG

“It’s been a joy to see your beautiful family grow, and your strength and faith is an inspiration to so many.” MC

“While I know ya’ll appreciate the help so much, please accept my thanks to you both for the time I get to spend with the quints. I can’t tell you what a blessing it is to get out of my daily “grind” and into their world. It is so refreshing to see their smiles and just watch them play, eat, sleep…and even fuss. Coming to your house gets me out of my trivial problems and reminds me of what life is all about. It is such a joy to spend time with them.” LG

“The last five weeks have been tough with a new baby but when I start to get down and feeling sorry for myself I just think of you and how strong you guys are and so committed to God and your family I perk up and have a great day!” LC

“I just wanted to you know your lives are touching many. Thank you for inspiring ours.” HH

“Your life and love of family has been an inspiration to me. Thank you for letting me see a glimpse of your life.” LJ

“I believe you are touching people’s lives through this, giving people hope and inspiration…Again, thank you for your words…….I believe God is defintely speaking to people through you.” LM

“Reading today’s blog blessed my heart and brought tears to my eyes.” BJ

“Appreciate the transparency. You’re truly being a witness through your life events.” DY

“It just seems to me when I see that kind of outpouring of prayers and service that it is evidence that the whole thing is meant to be and that God is behind it all. Isn’t that a nice feeling?” JW

“I don’t know of a non-churchy way of saying it, but your faith as evident in all you say is an example and encouragement to all… and an example of the way a christian dude should treat his wife.” BS

“Every evening before Madison goes to bed, we say our prayers. Last night, I prayed and right as I was about to say ‘Amen,’ Madison cut me off and said, ‘Mommy, you can’t end this prayer yet. I need to say something to God.’ She continued with this: ‘God, I want to ask you if you can let me and Mommy have a party. Because the daddy of the quintuplets wrote that they had a party because they were thankful for their babies and because they lived through the first year. Well me and Mommy have lived through four years without Daddy and I am thankful for Mommy and that she is still here with me, so I think we should celebrate too’ Thank you for sharing your precious family with us, and more importantly, thank you for touching my daughter’s heart.” SM

I wrote this letter to the JonesLife volunteers to thank them for all they have done over the last year, but we wanted to share it with everyone out there who has been involved in even the tiniest way in helping us to survive and thrive in this, year one of the Quintuplet Invasion…

Dear JonesLife Volunteers,

Can you believe The Fab Five is turning one tomorrow?!  We are so excited to celebrate their birthday with all of you!  I wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for what you have done for us over the past 12 months and in that regard I’d like to share a quick story with you.

As part of the filming for the documentary that is being filmed about our life with the five, I was being interviewed the other day when I was asked a question that I had not considered, only because to me, the answer was obvious.  However, in answering the question, I realized that the answer may not be as clear to others as it was so in my head and in Casey’s thoughts as well.

The question was simple:  “The birthday party…why are you guys throwing such a big party?  Why are you inviting this chaos into your home…I mean, 100 people?  Why would you do that?”  And this was my reply…

Are you kidding me?  This is a CEL-E-BRATION!  I mean, think about the history of what a birthday celebration originally meant – it was a true recognition of the fact that you had survived in this world another year.  This day and age we’ve lost the meaning of that because surviving another year, especially in America, is pretty much a given…it’s expected.  But this day is different; this birthday truly is recognition of what these babies have been through and what we have encountered as a family in the last 12 months.  Think about it, these five babies faced a life and death situation on the day of their birth.  I mean, we never really questioned whether they would live or die, but if they hadn’t been born where they were born and been under constant care for nearly three months and been given the most advanced treatments that the gift of medical science would allow, they likely would not have survived.  Truly, truly this is a birthday celebration like most families have not experienced!

On top of that, think about what this family has faced since the babies were born – the NICU days where they were strapped to every machine imaginable for their simple survival was not an easy thing to endure.  The sleepless nights, the constant feedings, the complete upheaval of every aspect of our lives, the challenge to our marriage, the challenge to Eliot’s state of mind, the strain on our close relationships, the crossover from being virtually needless to being incredibly needy…those things are not easy to overcome in a lifetime, let alone a single year on the calendar!  In spite of all of that, this family and this marriage is not merely surviving, we are thriving!

And, of course, this day is also a way of saying thank you.  We are doing this not only to celebrate the babies, but also as a way to honor the people who have helped make our family’s survival a possibility!  We have met some amazing people who have put their own lives on hold so many times and in so many ways just to help our family feel a slight sense of relief from the magnitude of all of this…change, challenge, stress, LIFE.  There is absolutely no way we would be where we are today without the help of our family and the volunteers, most of whom were complete strangers before the babies were born, others we barely knew.  This party is as much about thanking them as it is about celebrating the birth of our babies!

This party, this birthday celebration, this gathering is about so much more than cake and ice cream and a simple song.  It is about God’s blessings and God’s gifts and about God’s guiding hand on these five tiny lives, on this family’s pulse, and on the hearts of the great many people who faithfully provided sustenance and rest and relief.  Given all of that, how could we not celebrate?  How could we not give back this one small moment to recognize what this period in our lives has been and what it could not have been without?  I don’t see how it could be any other way…

So again, we say, “Thank you!” to all of the volunteers, family members, and friends who have helped us get through year one of the Quintuplet Invasion!!  It has been a challenging year, no doubt about it, but more importantly it has been a fun year and a year of incredible growth – literally and figuratively!  When we say we could not have done it without your help, you probably know better than us that we mean exactly what we say!

God Bless,

Ethan, Casey, and The Six Pack